Boom Boom Boom #1

I have absolutely no idea how to play the drums, but I'm enjoying it nonetheless. "Boom boom boom", as long as it sounds tribal, I'm elated. Sometimes it slides out of my hand when I hit too hard, well, I didn't have time to clean it.

I looked down at the cement floor; remembering just an hour ago it was quite nerve-wrecking trying to pry off the radius and ulna from the carpus, and that is after spending a painstaking half hour removing the skin and meat after chopping it off its owner. The radius I've set aside and I'm only using the ulna for these drum beats. I'm not interested in the larger humerus, so I left it with its owner. "Boom boom boom", I continued beating despite the annoying shrieking and cries of the owner.

Finally the annoyance got the better of me. I looked up at my girlfriend, previously chained at the arms, now chained at the neck. Her sleeves are soaked blood-red and the stub or whatever remains of the elbow, is bandaged as well as I could.

The pain must have subsided somewhat, or she's adapting to it, because suddenly I'm understanding sounds that come out from that mouth. "Why are you doing this?", she shrieked.

"Frack you!", I replied. "So easy for you to ask stupid questions when you know the penalty of cheating on me. Just because I'm a tailor, you have no respect for me!!"

Then she started to mutter few more words from her mouth which I decided to ignore and decided it to be lyrics sung, while I continued with my beat. "Boom boom boom".

1 hour later

My drum set is getting red, and slimy. Eeyuck! But this tibia rawks! It hits harder, and could eventually break my drum, but the satisfaction I get from it is undescribable. I've tried by best to stop the bleeding, which did stop, but eventually all of it would be drained out.

"Boom boom boom", I played on, this time determined to cause havoc to my drum set. I won't need it anymore after tonite. The skins of the set seem strong against my girlfriend's tibia. But they did break apart in the end. Satisfied, I approached my girlfriend now lying face-front facing me. Not speaking anymore. Just watching, awaiting her death I guess. No, I'm not yet satisfied.

Half an hour later

She's no longer heavy having lost a lot of weight. My, this is better than liposuction. With her half asleep in the car, I set up my tripod and video camera. This is a sight not to be missed. My car headlights are on. Good, enough light for the show to start.

"Remember when you wanted to be an actress?? Well, guess what? You are one. Hmm, let's see. I'm casting you as a turtle. In this movie, all you need to do is act like a turtle, and then swim underwater. Simple, right?"

With that, I pressed the Record button on the camera and carried her to the edge of the lake. I stepped into the water, then something I didn't except to happen, happened. All the memories came back; how we met at the lake when I saved her from drowning. How we made it a must to enjoy the view and scenery of the lake every anniversary. I remembered one night having a candlelight picnic enjoying the night stars. I looked at the girl in my arms, her eyes looking at me, as if pleading me to save her.

I looked at the skies, funny, rain is starting. I looked at her again, she's not mouthing anything anymore. Perhaps to weak to even talk. I sobbed twice, then, I laughed. Glee is filling me. I carried her over my head, one hand holding her neck and the other at her waist. Before I lost my balance, I threw her with all my might into the water. Though she didn't got flung far, I believed it was deep enough for her body to submerge.

In my thoughts, "Farewell, my actress". In my actions,... "Swim turtle, swim!! You're really looking like a turtle! Struggling to get underwater now ha?! With whatever remains of the limbs you have! Woo hoo!! What a great shot!", I jumped up and down shouting.

A truly memorable night.